Our Muslim in Washington

"Achmed. This is better than I could have predicted. Praise Allah. I must consult the Koran."

"What is it, Abdul?"

"We have conquered the American infidels. The Great Satan has fallen. The non-believers asked a Muslim to lead them and he is. They have surrendered to Allah."

"Allahu akbar, Abdul. Forty years to conquer them. Only 40 years."

"With the Great Hussein Obama putting the American infidels in the hands of Allah, it will take no time to drive the Jews from Palestine. Praise Allah, Achmed. Praise Allah. Jihad, Achmed. Jihad has carried us to the top. We have defeated the infidels and it took only 19 martyrs in four jets to do it. Allahu ackbar.


ANKARA, Turkey (AP) - Barack Obama, making his first visit to a Muslim nation as president, declared Monday the United States "is not and will never be at war with Islam."

Calling for a greater partnership with the Islamic world in an address to the Turkish parliament, Obama called the country an important U.S. ally in many areas, including the fight against terrorism. He devoted much of his speech to urging a greater bond between Americans and Muslims, portraying terrorist groups such as al Qaida as extremists who did not represent the vast majority of Muslims.

"Let me say this as clearly as I can," Obama said. "The United States is not and never will be at war with Islam. In fact, our partnership with the Muslim world is critical ... in rolling back a fringe ideology that people of all faiths reject."

The U.S. president is trying to mend fences with a Muslim world that felt it had been blamed by America for the Sept. 11, 2001, terrorist attacks.

"America's relationship with the Muslim world cannot and will not be based on opposition to al Qaida," he said. "We seek broad engagement based upon mutual interests and mutual respect."

"We will convey our deep appreciation for the Islamic faith, which has done so much over so many centuries to shape the world for the better, including my own country," Obama said.